Recent Posts
Poem as Lovely as a Tree
Trees have long been especially meaningful to me. Blame rote memory of Joyce Kilmer in third grade or maybe it was the Christmas tree we planted as a teen–trees speak to me. This week the neighbors two doors down cut down a favorite pine tree–as was their right . . . but we have been sad about this loss. It had to be over 100 ft tall, planted 70+ years ago by the home’s first family. Imagine how many childhood adventures that tree witnessed through the years. Forts, swings, picnics. Imagine how many critters have housed or sheltered in her…
Wake Up Call
Years ago I worked at one of my favorite skilled nursing memory care units at Asbury Methodist in Gaithersburg, MD. It was a favorite because of its interdisciplinary team. Every two weeks, without fail we met as a team–the nutritionist, the nurse, me-activities, the social worker, a CNA, even the doctor and discussed the 35 residents in the unit. We focused on those mandated by Medicare for review, but we discussed any ongoing changes or needs we were seeing within our little community. It was in these team meetings that we learned more of the family’s history and we collaborated…
Technology for the Win
I have become a reluctant outdoors-person. Maybe it is the prescribed shot-glass of sunscreen every 2 hours to protect from melanoma recurrence and thyroidectomy scar or the magnetism I have for ticks and mosquitoes . . . I prefer rainy days at this point. Maybe it is because of the fear of clogging the spa filters and the pool boy’s angst . . . and maybe it appears pitiful. But I am meeting myself in my reality–for today. Technology, like this video, gives me a range of options our parents’ did not have. We live in a beautiful world at…
Wild Roses
Wild roses, that is the scent that caught my nose today. The sweet smell of roses on the breeze. Stopping me in my tracks. Pushing pause on all the random agendas and thoughts streaming this morning.It was pure heaven.Of course I reveled in it–breathing deeply, smiling.Shaking off the tension that was building on the agendas of the day. For a bit.Then my brain started its meandering. First, the value placed on the scent of the perfume Mary massaged Jesus’ feet with. The shame Judas tried to place on her because of the value of the scent. Yet that is one…
Bubbling Spring
Spring is springing in the Northeast. There are wood violets in the grass, forsythia on the hill and daffodils filling random borders and byways. The birds are ecstatically building nests and singing for mates. The world is awake with hope. Spring bubbles up like laughter through the 30 degree mornings, past the craziness of daylight savings time, and despite any diagnosis of body, politics or global health. Nature gives us a small window into God’s grace, however you call it or perceive it. Laughter, humor is much like spring. Bubbling up in our support groups, our memory cafes–seeing the humor,…
Cool Change
October is a month of change. We have many months with change, but I think we particularly focus on Oct. whether in the South or the North. Shifting temps, snowbirds, leaf change–all peak in October. If you are like so many of us, music brings back memories. For me, I think of mountains and good times as an undergrad when I hear certain tunes. Maybe you have a fall set of tunes, flavors and smells. We are grooving to Pumpkin Spice Jazz on YouTube, with the smell of cinnamon streusel for back-up. The cool changes we once had with sailing…
New Strategies for Dementia Community
New Strategies for Dementia Community Life in the last year has been one of great adaptation. For those living with dementia, dementia community was even more vital. Research is showing that the isolation many experienced increased cognitive decline. Necessity made us adapt. For many of us, our adaptation involved combatting isolation with online and telephone resources. Out of necessity, we were able to pivot to continue our outreach and interconnection. This gave us flexibility in frequency and availability. Research shows that online education and cognitive behavior therapy improve the mental health of dementia caregivers. This is borne out in a…
Dementia Tussie Mussie
Awkward Apathy As both a family and a professional caregiver, apathy has been my Achilles heel. Trained as a recreation therapist, a classic left-brain extrovert—I work hard to get positive feedback. Apathy is one of the top four behaviors present in dementia world. Apathy is the care partner who doesn’t leave his recliner, his bed, who has lost all interest in participating. Different from depression, apathy is defined as diminished motivation that is not attributed to emotional distress.1 Depression involves emotional distress.2 No distress, simply flat. Environment is one key to addressing apathy. Person-environment fit is the research term used….
Awkward Apathy
As both a family and a professional caregiver, apathy has been my Achilles heel. Trained as a recreation therapist, a classic left-brain extrovert—I work hard to get positive feedback. Apathy is one of the top four behaviors present in dementia world. Apathy is the care partner who doesn’t leave his recliner, his bed, who has lost all interest in participating. Different from depression, apathy is defined as diminished motivation that is not attributed to emotional distress.1 Depression involves emotional distress.2 No distress, simply flat. Environment is one key to addressing apathy. Person-environment fit is the research term used. One study…
Grief and Dementia
Grief is not the most festive topic for this time of year, but ignoring it actually multiplies its impact. We in memory care world have learned more than one blog can capture. As the pandemic winds down, we are confronted by a disproportionate amount of loss and grief. Grief and dementia have long been a subject of research. Early comparison of grief from cancer caregivers and dementia caregivers found that post-death dementia caregivers experienced more relief than grief. Some have called the dementia journey a long good-bye. The counterparts are those who reference the long hello. This difference in approach…